"And having learned to deny our own yearning to be taken care of, we grew up looking for more oppotunities to do what we had become so good at; being preoccupied with someone else's wants and demands rather than acknowledging our own fear and pain and unmet needs. We've been pretending to be grown up for so long, asking for so little and doing so much, that now it seems too late to take our turn. So we help and help, and hope that our fear will go away and our reward will be love."

- Robin Norwood, Women Who Love Too Much,
as quoted by Elisabetta Franzoso, Stella's Mum Gets Her Groove Back.

if i got a dollar for every thought that crosses my mind daily, i'd probably be on par with the likes of Paris Hilton and her hot girlfriends by the end of this year. matter of fact, now it's racing madly more than ever. so much so, it took me long enough to put in this entry while i've been thinking about it for quite some time, honestly.

over the course of 3 days last week, i had attended an external course titled "Being a Powerful Communicator: The Art of Thinking, Talking, Listening and Presenting". it provoked truck loads more than simply theoritical lessons on communication & presentations, is what i have to say to that. in a class of 8+1, for whom i adopted great respect for after getting to know them within that short span of time, i learnt so much more about myself than i ever realised over the past 22 years. within 3 days that seemed to pass by so quickly, i found my voice, lost my silly inhibitions and opened up to 8 strangers in ways that surprised even myself. what i got in return, is priceless. and i believe, so very much, that all that took place is not a coincidence. God planned for me to be there, to learn, to make changes, and to believe i can pull through all this. masyallah.